


Baseball and Bucky and Steve

by doodleswiththoughts



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: 1940's, Blow Job, M/M, Making Out, high school age, pre war
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-14
Updated: 2015-08-14
Packaged: 2018-04-14 17:39:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,293
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4573671
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/doodleswiththoughts/pseuds/doodleswiththoughts
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Steve always wanted to play Baseball but never could because of his disabilities. Bucky is the star of the baseball team. They float a long as friends until they realize they're head over heels for each other.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Baseball and Bucky and Steve

Bucky was brilliant at baseball. It was a quality Steve had envied since they met way back when. It was actually how they met way back when.

Little league tryouts were an annual thing and Steve never skipped, though he was also never put on the team. The year Bucky moved to Brooklyn and tried out they made him team captain. They told Steve his asthma made them worry about him being equipment manager, let alone playing. So Steve watched Bucky play every Sunday and they walked home together after.

Deep down Steve was jealous of Bucky. But Bucky was the only person who didn’t act like Steve was a burden. Bucky treated him like a person and that was more important than any sport. So instead of hating him, he reasoned to himself that it was perfectly normal to envy someone who had something you wanted but could never have. But it wasn’t Bucky’s fault and his jealousy didn’t change what Bucky meant to him. Steve buried his envy in favor of friendship.

When Steve was very little, before his dad passed, they used to go to baseball games. Steve remembers his first game. He doesn’t remember who won or even who played for that matter. What he does remember—and vividly—was the feeling it gave him. The cheering of the crowd, the taste of the stadium food and the overwhelming, shared excitement that filled the stadium seemed to fill his chest till he thought he might burst. When he was very little he dreamed that someday people would cheer like that for him. Until he got older and began to really understand what his physical limitations would mean for him and his future. He started to understand that baseball was his impossible dream; a dream that Bucky could never know about.

By the time they reached high school Bucky had been team captain of half a dozen or so little league teams. It wasn’t a surprise that Bucky was made team captain for the high school team. This rankled a lot of seniors who felt like they had been cheated by the smug freshman. So they beat him up. Regularly. Until they saw him play. Then they didn’t beat him up anymore. But that didn’t stop the glaring.

None of this mattered to Bucky. He was all confidence and bravado and took each glower like a medal of honor, with a cheeky grin and a thank you.

Steve was even less popular. His tendency to pick fights with people twice his size got him in trouble and once a week, like clockwork he ended up sitting on the pavement, bleeding from somewhere, telling Bucky, “I had him on the ropes.”

To which Bucky would respond that he was being an idiot and shoulda just stayed down. Though Bucky had to admit that no matter what Steve would defend anyone getting picked on till he was unconscious on the floor. He would just keep getting back up. Bucky admired that about Steve, was even perhaps a little jealous of that quality. When Bucky asked him why all he would do was shrug and say, “I don’t like bullies.”

Bucky only ever got beat up because he was good at baseball and the seniors didn’t like it. Course that increased his reputation with the girls at school, so who was he to complain. Steve got beat up because he was legitimately a good person who cared about people. Which apparently wasn’t an attractive quality that girls look for.

Sophomore year Bucky thought that maybe if Steve got into some extra curriculars he would be too preoccupied to pick fights with anyone and everyone. He convinced Steve to audition for the spring musical with him. It was “Lady, be good.” Bucky wasn’t expecting to make it let alone play the lead. Steve figured Bucky would get the lead. Seeing as it was about a brother and sister down on their luck and Bucky was so charming. It was a perfect fit. Steve wasn’t cast. But after catching him sketching the drama teacher put him to work painting sets. He took to it like a fish to water and Bucky thought he’d never seen a more beautiful grungy alley in his life. Bucky thanked his lucky stars that Steve had become a part of it at all. After a rejection like that Steve would’ve turned down any chance at socializing ever again, not matter how much Bucky begged.

The musical was great for Steve, or that’s what Bucky thought until it was over and the friends he seemed to have made drifted back to their respective cliques.

And then it was just Steve and Bucky again.

Steve and Bucky and Baseball.

This didn’t necessarily matter, Steve was Bucky’s best friend and Bucky figured even if Steve didn’t have anyone else he would always have Bucky. Bucky promised himself that. He’d promise Steve too but that sort of thing tends to come off the wrong way and he wouldn't want to lose Steve while putting his foot in his mouth trying to be there for him.

 

It came about one day in late spring that Steve happened to let it slip in a bitter tone how jealous he was that Bucky was so damn good at baseball. They were sitting on a curb out front of Steve’s apartment building, watching people wander in and out of the drugstore across the street. Steve was doing his best not to look Bucky in the eye because the dumbfounded look on his face was more than Steve could deal with right now.

“I mean, I’m not going to tell you that you can’t play, but wouldn’t you rather spend your time doing something that doesn’t make you pass out?”

Steve shook his head, “Nope.”

“You’re pretty good at that art thing, why don’t you focus on that?”

Steve shrugged.

A woman with a baby on her hip exited the drug store with a bag of diapers in tow. Bucky frowned, keeping his eyes fixed on the door. “You know sometimes I’m jealous of you.”

Steve’s head snapped up from where he had been throwing pebbles into the street, “What, why?” He was incredulous.

Now it was Bucky’s turn to shrug and avoid eye contact. “The way you stand up for people who need to be stood up for. You never back down.” He paused and glanced at Steve. “It’s equal parts stupid and admirable.”

Silence fell between them for a while.

“I never knew you felt like that.” Steve didn’t mean it to come out sounding so small and tender but it did.

“I never knew _you_ felt like that.” Bucky said, making a face and elbowing Steve gently in the ribs.

Silence again.

Then Steve turned to face Bucky, “But you know it’s not about you right? It’s about baseball.”

The earnestness in Steve’s voice made Bucky laugh, “What is it about you and baseball?”

“I dunno Buck.” But Steve did know. It wasn’t actually about baseball. It was about being strong enough to do something purely physical. People look up to baseball players. No one had ever looked up to Steve. Literally or figuratively. For the first time in perhaps his whole life Steve was the envied and not the envier. The admiration in Bucky’s confession swelled Steve’s heat with pride knowing that someone somewhere thought he was worth something. He knew Bucky had never thought of him as burdensome, but it was something else entirely to know Bucky thought he was brave. His confession stirred something in the pit of his stomach. He suddenly felt a little lightheaded. “I dunno.” He repeated.

The feelings of jealousy faded and were replaced by a new fondness for Bucky. Bucky has always been his best friend but there was something different about this new feeling.

It was a long time later that Steve felt familiar feelings of jealousy creep up. It happened when the girls at school would drape themselves all over Bucky. They would kiss right at the lunch table. Steve thought he was jealous of Bucky but a small voice in the back of his mind whispered that maybe he was jealous of the girls. He did his best to squash that voice for a very long time. He did a good job of it too till Bucky dragged him out on a double date to the movies.

They went to see the movie version of “Anything Goes,” with Bing Crosby and Ethel Merman. The high school had done a production of it a few years back and Bucky said the girls were dying to see it. But Bucky’s date didn’t get to see much of it considering how far down Bucky’s throat her tongue was. Steve’s date looked just as uncomfortable as he felt and ate her popcorn while keeping her attention deliberately focused on the screen.

Steve couldn’t help glancing over from time to time feeling that weird feeling, like his stomach was twisting itself into a jealous, angry knot. He tried to put his arm around his date’s shoulders, but she looked so uncomfortable he changed his mind and pretended to yawn instead.

The movie was good, he thought. The tap dancing made him winded just watching it, but Bing Crosby and Ethel Merman were very good together. Better than he and his date were anyway. But not half as good as Bucky and his date. Apparently.

They walked the girls home from the movies. After an awkward good bye from all sides, though awkward for different reasons, they headed home themselves.

After a few minutes of silent walking Steve snapped, “Why do you always do that Bucky?”

Startled, Bucky asked, “Do what?”

“Set me up with some girl who doesn’t like me then spend the whole time making out with some other girl who you don’t even like.”

Bucky frowned, “I like her. And how was I supposed to know you wouldn’t hit it off with Sherrie?”

“Because I don’t hit it off with anyone, that’s what you do. You hit it off with everyone.”

“Not you apparently.”

Steve stopped. “What?” He honestly thought he had misheard. Bucky was on his good ear side and he usually made an effort to speak a little louder and enunciate a little more, but it had to be a mistake.

The tips of Bucky’s ears turned red, “Nah I didn’t mean it like that, but I don’t know why you’re so sore at me.”

Steve huffed. “I just thought double dates were supposed to be about four people enjoying each others company. Not one couple being inappropriate in public and two third wheels.”

“Inappropriate?” Bucky smirked, “Is that what this is about? You jealous Stevie?”

“Absolutely not. Not of that.” Public displays of affection really did make Steve uncomfortable. It’s not that he was bothered by those sorts of things in general, he just didn’t need to see them live.

“Then what is this about? Even if you and Sherrie didn’t hit it off wasn’t the movie good?”

“Well yea but—”

“But what Steve? You didn’t even try with Sherrie.”

“I didn’t want to make her uncomfortable.” Steve jammed his hands in his pockets and scuffed his shoes along the sidewalk. “And how would you even know if I tried?”

“If you had tried you probably would’ve hit it off. Besides it’s a first date, it’s going to be a little akward.”

Steve didn’t speak the rest of the walk home and the silence was as uncomfortable as the date.

 

Steve’s silence continued into the next school week. No matter what Bucky did he couldn’t get Steve to talk to him. Friday rolled around and he made the decision to confront him after school. Course Bucky forgot that’s when Steve usually picked a fight with one of the seniors who was probably harassing some freshmen. By the time he found Steve the bullies had come and gone leaving him with a bloody nose and scrapes on his hands from where he’d fallen. Steve was just picking gravel out of his palms when Bucky approached him.

“I need to talk to you.”

Steve glared up at him from where he was sitting on the curb, “In case you hadn’t noticed I’m a little busy. Maybe some other time.” He looked exhausted, like he was going to pass out at any second. Bucky knew that look. The fight had gone on a little too long and Steve had almost had an asthma attack. His heart was probably going crazy and he had probably only just stopped wheezing.

“No Steve now.” Steve tried to push himself to his feet but fell back on the curb wincing as he curled a hand around his bruised ribs.

Bucky reached out to help him up but Steve swatted his had away. Bucky sat down next to him.

“Why are you so angry at me Steve?”

“I’m not.”

“Then why won’t you talk to me?” Steve shrugged.

“That’s not good a enough Steve, why have you been ignoring me all week?”

“Bucky—”

“No Steve, why? Why Steve?”

“Because I think I might like you as more than a friend.” Steve snapped.

Silence.

“Oh. Is that all?”

“Oh is that all.” Steve mocked him, making a goofy face.

“Seriously is that it? Cuz that’s not a big deal, I like you as more than a friend too.”

Steve thought his heart must’ve skipped a beat. “What?”

“Yea you’re like a brother to me too buddy.” Bucky wrapped his arm around Steve and rubbed his knuckles into Steve’s head, making him wince.

“Oh. Yeah, that’s what I meant.” Steve looked crestfallen. Bucky started laughing so suddenly it startled Steve out of his misery.

“Oh my god. Oh my god Steve. You should’ve seen you face.” He mimicked the blond’s crestfallen face for a moment before laughing again. Steve huffed and pushed himself to his feet but Bucky grabbed his wrists and pulled him back down. “No, wait, stop. I know what you meant.” Bucky said suddenly serious.

“Oh.”

More silence.

“The thing is Steve… I don’t know… I don’t think we can do… that.”

“I know. People get throw in jail for thoughts like this… I figured if we just didn’t see each other then maybe it would go away.”

Bucky shook his head, “I don’t think it will go away, I’ve been trying to make it go away.”

“How long?”

“Feels like forever.”

Steve hesitated before saying, “It’s weird. I like girls and all but…”

“You like guys just as much. Yeah. I feel the same way.”

Steve nodded.

“Hey, maybe we shouldn’t be having this conversation here.”

Steve nodded again and Bucky helped him to his feet and they walked silently back to Steve’s. His mom wouldn’t be home for hours so first things first Bucky took Steve to the bathroom.

“First aid where it always is?” Bucky asked, already heading for the medicine cabinet. Steve nodded, looking ruefully at his palms. “

You really outta go right home on Fridays.” Bucky sighed, putting some alcohol on rag. “Hold out your hands.”

“I can do it myself,”

“I know you can. Just let me help you ok?” Steve sighed and held out his hands palms up. “I’m not kidding, you do this almost every week.”

Steve shrugged again, trying to ignore Bucky’s concern.

“Have you considered not starting fights? Just in general?”

“If I don’t stand up for those kids who will?”

Bucky exhaled slowly, “Someone else. Someone without athsma and heart troubles who has to sit down after walking a block.”

“I can take care of myself,” Steve snapped. “And anyone else who needs to be taken care of.”

Bucky let it go. By now he had finished with Steve’s hands, they weren’t bleeding so he let them be and moved on to Steve’s face. It was just the nose today, which had already stopped bleeding and there was nothing to do about the blossoming bruise on his cheek.

“Finished,” Bucky sighed, packing everything back into the small box.

“My room then?” Bucky nodded and they headed across the hall. Steve shut the door behind him and Bucky sat down on the bed, bouncing a little.

“So.” Bucky was the first to speak.

“So.” Steve replied slowly. Steve remained by the door, shuffling his feet awkwardly.

“You’re making me nervous, sit down.” Bucky patted the space on the bed next to him and Steve shuffled over and sat down, visibly tense.

“So what do we do now?” Steve’s voice was quiet and he continued to stare at his scraped hands in his lap. Bucky put his left hand over Steve’s right and interlaced their fingers. “I think we hold hands.” Bucky noticed the smallest tremor in Steve’s hand. Bucky’s hands were strong but gentle and Steve curled his fingers holding Bucky’s hand a little tighter. It stung but it was worth it.

Bucky stared at their intertwined hands and nodded like yes, good, first step accomplished. Steve couldn’t take his eyes of their hands and was startled as Bucky spoke. “Yea I think that’s a good start.” Their eyes met. “This is nice Steve.” He smiled and it felt genuine, not like the cocky smirk he used around everyone else. Steve smiled in reply but said nothing. Bucky’s eyes fell to Steve’s lips. They looked soft. They had always looked soft. Bucky had often wondered what it would be like to kiss Steve. He figured now was as good a time as any to find out. He reached up with his free hand and cupped the side of Steve’s face, stroking his thumb along the blonde’s sharp cheekbone. He usually tried not to think about Steve and his stupidly soft looking pink lips but at this moment he couldn't help himself.

Steve wasn’t pretty. Pretty was a word for the way girls looked, a very accurate word for them but not for Steve. Steve was handsome. But it wasn’t handsome like the men Bucky watched in the movies. He wasn’t like Bing Crosby or Humphrey Bogart. He was his own kind of handsome. Maybe he was just Bucky’s “type,” whatever that meant.

Bucky leaned forward slowly; tilting Steve’s face to meet his and pressed their lips together. Steve’s lips were just as soft as he had imagined. Bucky freed his other hand from Steve’s and put it on the other side of Steve’s face. Steve’s hands shakily found their way to Bucky’s chest. And so they kissed. And it was slow and meaningful and warm and Steve thought it was the best thing he’d ever experienced. Bucky realized this may very well be Steve’s first kiss and so he decided to keep it sweet, no tongues. For now. There would be time for tongues and breathy moans later, or so he hoped.

Bucky pulled back only because he thought Steve might not be able to breathe. He put his forehead on Steve’s, hands still on either side of his face, Steve’s still on his chest.

“I think we skipped a couple steps.” Steve breathed.

Bucky chuckled, “I don’t know if we could’ve done those. It’s not like we can go out on a date and hold hands and share a milkshake.”

Steve’s face changed suddenly from happy bliss to a sad, pinched sort of look.

“We can still go to the movies.” Bucky said hurriedly.

“We can’t hold hands.” Steve dropped his hands from Bucky’s chest and Bucky felt suddenly cold.

“Well no, but we can get milkshakes.” Bucky was trying and trying hard to make everything ok in light of this new development. Steve turned so he was facing the edge of the bed. Bucky felt a knot in his stomach at how dejected Steve sounded. “We can’t share.”

He elbowed Steve gently. “Do you really want to share a milkshake with me? You wouldn’t get half your fair share.”

Steve chuckled, “No I suppose not.”

“So it’s settled. We’ll hold hands at the movies and find places to kiss and we’ll have our own milkshakes and no one will have to know.” Bucky nodded like they had found the solution, knowing it wasn’t good enough.

Steve nodded slowly. Bucky was right. It wasn’t good enough and Steve was terrible at secrets. They shouldn’t have to hide but it was better to hide and stay alive than the alternative.

 

As it turned out, movies and milkshakes were treats that they couldn’t afford, so it only happened once every few months, if that, and usually it was just the movie. Mostly they went for walks in the park if they were tired of being holed up at Steve’s. Steve went to all of Buck’s baseball games, which wasn’t new but it made Bucky happier than it ever had before. Sometimes they went to the museums Steve picked out. Bucky wasn’t interested in what was in the museums, just the way Steve’s face lit up. The best part was that most of the museums were free. They got a few strange looks but that had more to do with their age and relatively rag tag appearance than them being two boys. Though in 1936 it was a miracle any museum was open so nobody questioned them.

They found places to kiss too. Mostly it was in back alleys, behind dumpsters. There was a junk yard a few blocks out and sometimes they sat in the back seat of wrecked cars and made out, pretending it was their car and that the world was alright with them parking on a hillside to run their hands over each others bodies and press their lips together.

They did move onto tongues. The first time was a Friday after school. Steve tasted like pennies and the pizza they served in the cafeteria. Steve was still picking fights and he probably cut the inside of his mouth when he got hit. Blood is not the most pleasant of tastes but it was never enough to make him pull away from Steve.

As much fun as the junkyard was they mostly did this in Steve’s room. His mom worked a lot of late shifts, trying to keep them afloat. Which gave them lots of alone time.

It was one of these days and Steve was drawing, his back set against the wall in between the door and his dresser. Bucky was sitting on his bed, flipping through a horror comic book he’d gotten for half price at the newsstand because the cover was ripped. Steve was drawing him, though Bucky didn’t know it. Steve thought the way the light touched the side of Bucky’s face, making it look like he was a glowing angel was well worth capturing on paper. He wished briefly that Bucky was closer so he could draw the little details that his astigmatism prevented him from seeing the whole way across the room. As it was he could see blurry shapes, which was enough to get started with. Plus he knew Bucky’s face by heart at this point.

Bucky glanced up and caught Steve squinting at him. “What?”

“Nothing!” Steve turned crimson and hurriedly went back to sketching.

Bucky tossed the comic aside and made his way across the small room. “Whacha drawing?”

Steve instinctively clutched the sketchbook to his chest. “I told you, nothing.”

“Oh yea I’ll bet it’s nothing.” Bucky gave Steve a grin like a cat looking at a mouse. “I’ll bet you’re drawing dirty picture Rogers. I’ll bet that little book of yours is just chalk full of them.” He’s crouched down on the balls of his feet now in front of Steve.

“It is not!” he snaps, a little defensively, “It’s mostly landscapes.”

“But not all landscapes.”

Steve hesitates, “Well no… you can only draw so many buildings…”

“So what else do you draw?”

Steve turned pink again, “Nothing. I mean. It doesn’t matter, nothing important.”

He had relaxed a little and Bucky took the opportunity to make a grab for the book. Steve yelped and fought to hold onto it, but Bucky was twice his size and easily snatched it. He held the book at arms length with one hand pressed against Steve’s chest while the blond yelled obscenities.

“Language Stevie.” Bucky chastised him mockingly, “You kiss your mother with that mouth?”

“No but I kiss you with it sometimes.” The response is so swift and so smooth it threw Bucky for a loop and Steve pounced on him, grabbing for his sketchbook. He ended up straddling Bucky’s hips with Bucky flat on his back. He’s still holding the sketchbook out of Steve’s reach.

“What is so important in this sketchbook of yours?”

“It’s not important. It’s stupid. Really stupid.”

“Then what’s the big deal?”

Steve relents, “I just don’t want you to look till it’s done.”

Bucky’s face softens. “Alright Steve.”

He handed him back the book without looking at the picture.

“Thank you,” Steve moved to get off of Bucky, but the brunet wrapped his hands around Steve’s hips and kept him from moving.

“I don’t think you’re going to have time to finish it right now though.” Bucky grins.

“Oh yea? Why’s that?” Steve thinks he has an idea, but Bucky seemed to be planning something so he let him take the lead.

Bucky wrapped his hand around the back of Steve’s neck and pulled the blond down flat against his chest, pressing their lips together. As they kissed Bucky ran his hands down Steve’s back, squeezing his ass through his thin pants. Steve made a small noise that was muffled by their kiss. Bucky put his hands on Steve’s back again and rolled them over so Steve was on the floor and he was over the blond, never breaking the kiss. Bucky was carful to keep his full weight off Steve’s body. Bucky knew Steve was too proud to admit to not feeling well, but he didn’t want to aggravate any of Steve’s pre-existing conditions, he had plans that required Steve to be breathing.

Bucky started to unbutton Steve’s shirt, kissing along his jaw and down his neck.

“Bucky-” His words were cut off but a low moan as Bucky sucked a hickey into the place where his neck met his shoulder. His hands fisted in the back of Bucky’s t-shirt and he arched slightly, breathing a little harder.

Bucky slipped a hand under Steve’s back, lifting him up and tugging off his fully unbuttoned shirt. The brunet laid him gently back down on the bare wood. He kissed his way down Steve’s neck to his chest, mapping every inch of exposed skin with his lips. Steve ran his hands through Bucky’s hair, thinking, not for the first time, how handsome Bucky was all muscle and smiles with wavy hair and pretty eyes.

He looked up from where he had kissed all the way down Steve’s stomach to the top of his pants, keeping Steve’s eyes locked with his.

The realization of what Bucky was planning hit him all of a sudden as Bucky began to undo his pants. Sure he’d done it to Buck, and they had both really enjoyed it but they hadn’t done it the other way around.

Before he could question if Bucky was really sure he wanted to do this, his pants and boxers had been pulled down and Bucky was kissing up from the base of his dick. Steve made a strangle noise in the back of his throat as Bucky flicked his tongue across the slit, licking up the precum that had collected there as a result of Bucky’s attentions.

“B-Buck I—Oh” he moaned aloud as Bucky sucked him entirely into his mouth, able to take the full length with ease.

The first time Bucky had seen Steve hard he was impressed because for a little guy he was pretty big. Bucky had spent the last week covertly practicing for this on whatever he could get his mouth on without arousing suspicion. Meanwhile, Steve fisted his hands in Bucky’s wavy hair. Bucky hummed happily around his length, vibrating Steve’s dick, which made Steve pull a little harder.

Bucky pulled of entirely and before Steve could complain deep throated him again. Over and over, sometimes fast, sometimes slow, sometimes the whole way down sometimes halfway down.

“Oh God Bucky please I—”

Bucky switched what he was doing, wrapped his hands around Steve’s shaft, jerking him off with his mouth still on the tip. Bucky’s tongue swirled around the head in slow circles.

Steve started to throb, on the edge of cumming and just before he did Bucky pulled his mouth off, but kept jerking with his hand, just in time for Steve to cum all over his stomach and Bucky’s hand.

Steve was breathing hard. “Bucky… that was…”

“Incredible? I know, I’m so good at this, maybe I could make it a career,” he joked, cleaning them up with a shirt of Steve’s that was laying half in and half out of the hamper. Steve didn’t respond, just kept trying to breathe.

“You okay?” Bucky asked, suddenly concerned, “Didn’t kill you did I?”

Steve laughed, “Far from it. That really was great Buck.”

Bucky grinned, “Good.” He lay down on the floor next to Steve and for a while neither of them spoke. “Hey Steve,” Bucky’s voice was quiet, like he was nervous, “I wanted to ask you something…”

“What is it Buck?”

Bucky rolled onto his side and propped himself up on his elbow. “I was wondering… well. I was wondering if you wanted to… to go all the way.”

Steve blinked, surprised, “I—Can guys do that?”

“Yeah, I asked someone about it and apparently.”

“How does it work exactly?”

“Um.” Bucky leant down and even though they’re around he whispers the details in Steve’s ear.

Steve wrinkled his nose, “That sounds gross and painful.”

“I know what it sounds like.” Bucky huffs, “But apparently if you do it right it doesn’t hurt and feels really good.”

Steve shot him a look, “How exactly do you even know this?”

Bucky flops on his back, “I know a guy.”

“What guy?”

“Just a guy at the newsstand.”

“How exactly do you get to chatting about something like that with a guy at the newsstand?”

“He um… he saw us come in one day and just guessed…”

Steve’s jaw tightened. “So. He knows then.”

“Yeah, but it’s not bad, he’s done it and he lives with his boyfriend upstairs so we’re ok.”

Steve relaxed a little, “Oh.”

“I’ve kind of been asking for advice.” Bucky looked embarrassed.

“I suppose that’s a good thing. Is that how you got so good at the um…”

“Yeah.”

An awkward silence followed this.

“But it is good, because he gave me these,” Bucky fishes around in his pocket and pulls out, much to Steve’s chagrin, a string of condoms and a tube of Johnson and Johnsons surgical lubricant.

“He just gave you all that? That must’ve cost him a fortune.”

“He said it was no problem.”

“How do you even get this kind of stuff?” Steve questioned, turning the tube over in his hands to read the back.

Bucky shrugged, “I have no idea, but he said it’s the best for sex.”

Steve looked up at that. They had indeed been discussing sex, but actually saying it made it suddenly a lot more real.

“You don’t have to say anything now,” Bucky was practically tripping over his words, “You can think about it and even if you don’t wanna it’s totally fine I don’t want you to feel pressured or anything I—”

Steve kissed Bucky to shut him up. “I want to. I think it will be great.” And that was that.


End file.
